Posts (page 2)

Still here.
An act of God
A will of God
Body doing all it can to survive
Mind trying to make sense out of it all
Chemicals of the body trying to bring me back down under the ground.
Love?
Addiction?
Love without addiction?
Shame?
Low self esteem?
Molestation?
Abandonment?
That was then.
This is now.
Why should that matter?
But it does.
Self sabotage.
Yet striving to do better.
Too much food.
Too much wine.
Not enough affection.
Love of friends.
So much love of friends.
Why can't that show me how much love there is in my life?
Sex.
Wonderful.
But not even important anymore.
Unless there is no love and affection.
connecting?
So important.
Balance
Unknown to me
Hard to manage
Extremes?
Home sweet home.
Damaged.
Beyond repair?
I don't know.
I hope not.
Serenity prayer.
Morning Noon and Night
Be grateful.
don't forget.
Experience Strength & Hope
Time to cry.
Pussy boy.

Useless
Hopeless
Spineless
Helpless
HOPELESS

There have been good times.
But now the light is off.
Maybe it is time to turn the light off for good.

Goodbye is almost a clear picture now.
It's always been about the how.

But now the calm is settling in.

How do you turn things around
when your whole mental and
physical being is seemingly on self-destruct?
And you seem to have no control?
Just holding on for dear life?

What are your predictions for the World Series?

Colorado! Sweep!

such stupid choices sometimes
wanting love
reaching too far
trying too hard
doing it all the wrong way.
what is the right way?
is there one?
meant to be alone?
meant to be sad and lonely?
meant to be a martyr?
who knows.
live or die?
try or stop trying?
hope or stop hoping?
where do you content yourself?
are you a loser when you content yourself
before you reach your true potential?
when do you know you have reached the potential
life will allow you?
what do you choose to do then?
what choice do i have?

I didn't write this but found it and it is something i want to learn to live by

People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered.
Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives.
Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you may win some false friends and some true enemies.
Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you.
Be honest and frank anyway.

Transparency may make you vulnerable.
Be transparent anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, others may be jealous.
Be happy anyway.

What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.
Build anyway.

The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow.
Do good anyway.

People who really want help may attack you if you help them.
Help them anyway.

Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough.
Give the world your best anyway.

You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God.
It is never between you and them anyway.

It is okay and wonderful to be successful
To allow success
and to allow others too enjoy you,
All of you.
your beauty, your talent, your goodwill!

I lost a close friend today.
Not to death or something so obvious.
Just to misunderstanding and hurt feelings and pride.
And out of nowhere.
It's a pity.
But survival and the laws of self preservation say
you have to go on and do what's best for you.
My heart is not that way, but for once
I will listen to my head.
Nothing is forever.